Theresa Trio

Theresa Trio
St. Therese of Lisieux / Ven. Maria Theresa Quevedo / St. Teresa of Avila


December 15, 2014

I Have Discovered the Cure for Divorce...

It came to me in a Eureka! moment that had previously been lost within the silly notion that I must maintain a good paying job to support my family. I mean, that is a moral prerogative as much a secular one, correct? No one can hope to support a family without a good paying job, correct? No one would should ever get married unless they have the mental capacity to understand this, correct?

So...that is what I did, albeit in as many steps as we had babies over the years. So it took awhile and we still had money troubles (shortages?) for obviously there is never enough when you have stair-step kids. But we managed over the years through family and friend donations (and WIC, for awhile). Life was hard, but then we weren't promised happiness here, were we? Then, perhaps unwittingly, I made what turned out to be (in one sense only) one of the biggest mistakes of my life...

I agreed to move to Kansas, a very good state to live in despite the promotion of Kathleen Sibelius to D.C. and her part in the ObamaCare debacle (don't hold that against us).  I accepted a job that paid a good hourly wage and where the overtime and production bonuses gradually increased my gross wages. A promotion to the office increased my overtime and, now-sales bonus, to the point were I found myself in the yearly salary range that one finds on an online form that asks demographic information about you: $75-$85,000!

Whooo! Aahhh!  I had become a millionaire! I had hit the big time! Our money troubles were over! 

Uh...oh...wait. a. minute. Wait just a gol-darn minute...I still got's 10 kids, a wife and a mortgage to support!

Ah, shucks. Exhilaration over. Fortunately, we continued our struggle.

But...unfortunately for me, 10 years down the road making that much money was to be my doom. When my former/ex-spouse (Dear Lord, how I hate those terms!) initiated her divorce, that is what all of the support obligations were based upon - my Gross Salary. Not the Net salary, mind (which was only about $18.33/month), but the Gross. I found myself obligated to paying spouse and children less money than equaled the normal monthly expenses of our home, but also far more than what I could afford to pay. Now-separate expenses of apartment rent, food, gas, insurance, haircuts, previous financial obligations, the necessary funds for activities during visitations...well, you can take it to its logical conclusion and understand that there was almost every month a negative amount in my ability to pay fully what was required. And, its only gotten worse since (but that's for another post, perhaps...)

So, what do you do? What is the solution? Listen up, now...

In order to prevent an un-wanted, unnecessary and imprudent divorce, I highly recommend that you never -EVER! - accept employment that pays much more than what is at the lowest income level you can maintain that prevents eviction and starvation for your family. If you subscribe to this theory in practice voluntarily, it will prevent you from having to do so involuntarily, should the unthinkable happen. Now you should, of course, be truthful, honest and open to your betrothed/spouse that this is your intention and ask her/him if she/he can live that way. And tell them transparent as air about it. Leave no question unanswered. Lay it all on the table with one roll of the dice. Far better to find out now the limit of your intended's love, than after it is sorta/maybe too late (if your're already married, its too late, just so you know.)

So...if you're both in agreement now, read on.

According to the 2013 US Census, the median US income for 2009-2013 was $53,046.00. But wait! In the state of Kansas where I live, it was only $51,332...a much better figure for sure when a divorce attorney starts totaling up the dollars he/she, your spouse, and the court will take from you. So be sure and look at the median income for your state before you go looking for a job. Take the lowest of the two figures and seek out a job that limits your potential for advancement in salary, bonus and overtime to at or near those levels (McDonalds, anyone??) By doing so, you will ensure a long and stable marriage, for neither one of you will truly be able to afford a divorce. Assuming, that is, that you have more than the average 2.51 persons per household in Kansas (or the 2.63 in the US). And you probably will, unless you use contraception (or NFP outside its accepted grave reasons.) This is the required action that will ensure that kids remain in a two-biological-parent home. The one event that may force two spouses to settle their fully reconcilable differences or face the surety of a decimated family, obliterated parent-child relationships and the sacrificing of your children's happiness upon the altar of personal self-fulfillment (AKA: personal happiness). 

So, there you have it. The cure-all for divorce. The negation of the need for the 2015 Family Synod. The solution needed to preserve marriages and families:


All I have to do now is figure out a way to market the darn thing...

Copyright 2014 David Heath - All Rights Reserved

December 12, 2014

Spero News: To understand, you must believe

My latest article for Spero NewsTo understand, you must believe
was posted  today. I am very grateful for their publishing my articles, and ask that you please click on the link and visit their site.


Copyright 2014 David Heath - All Rights Reserved

December 8, 2014


From an interview of the Holy Father by La Nación, posted on Rorate Caeli here, I give my reply to his reply of:

- "...I am not afraid." (Pope Francis)

- Afraid of what? (La Nación)

In the case of divorcees who have remarried, we posed the question, what do we do with them? [YOU CAN TELL THEM TO GO BACK TO THEIR FIRST MARRIAGES AND STOP LIVING IN MORTAL SIN, WHICH WILL SEND THEM TO HELL IF THEY DIE UNREPENTANT] What door can we allow them to open? [THE CONFESSIONAL DOOR] This was a pastoral concern: will we allow them to go to Communion? [YES, AFTER THEY DO WHAT THE REST OF US SINNERS DO - CONFESS OUR SINS TO A PRIEST] Communion alone is no solution. [CORRECT -THE SOLUTION IS EXAMINATION, CONFESSION, CONTRITION AND THEN COMMUNION] The solution is integration [NO IT IS NOT. SEE ABOVE.]
- Afraid of following this trail, the road of the synod. [WELL, YOU SHOULD BE BECAUSE OF THE DOOR YOU'LL BE OPENING TO NEGATE OTHER SINS] I am not afraid because it is the road that God has asked us to follow. [REALLY, YOUR HOLINESS? I THOUGHT HE WANTED US TO FOLLOW HIS PATH TO HOLINESS, WHICH REQUIRES US TO FORGO SINNING.] More so, the Pope is the ultimate guarantor, the Pope is there to care for the process. We must move forward. In my last address I said something interesting, [WHAT?] I pointed out that we had not addressed any part of the doctrine of the Church concerning marriage. [GOOD] In the case of divorcees who have remarried, we posed the question, what do we do with them? [SHOW THEM THE DOOR...] What door can we allow them to open? [...THE CONFESSIONAL DOOR] This was a pastoral concern: will we allow them to go to Communion? [NO, BEFORE CONFESSION and YES, AFTER CONFESSION] Communion alone is no solution. [YES!! SOUND CATHOLIC TEACHING!!] The solution is integration. [WHAA? UH, ONLY AFTER CONFESSION] They have not been excommunicated, true. But they cannot be godfathers to any child being baptized, mass readings are not for divorcees, they cannot give communion, they cannot teach Sunday school, there are about seven things that they cannot do, [AND THIS IS THE CHURCHES PROBLEM? SEEMS TO ME IT'S THE PROBLEM OF THE SINNER TO CORRECT THE "I CAN'T DO THIS or THAT... MEME"] I have the list over there. Come on! If I disclose any of this it will seem that they have been excommunicated in fact! [NO...THEY'RE JUST DENIED COMMUNION IN FACT, UNTIL THEY ARE WORTHY TO RECEIVE HIM] Thus, let us open the doors a bit more. [UH...JUST HOW HARD ARE CONFESSIONAL DOORS TO OPEN? BUT... I SUPPOSE IF WALMART HAS GREETERS...] Why cant they be godfathers and godmothers? [BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT PRACTICING THEIR FAITH PROPERLY] "No, no, no, what testimony will they be giving their godson?". [NONE. BECAUSE THEY CAN'T OF THEIR OWN VOLITION]; The testimony of a man and a woman saying "my dear, I made a mistake [EXAMINATION OF CONSCIENCE], I was wrong here, [CONTRITION FOR THE SIN] but I believe our Lord loves me, I want to follow God, [SINCERITY] I was not defeated by sin, I want to move on [FIRM AMENDMENT TO SIN NO MORE]". Anything more Christian than that? [NOPE. THEY'RE THE BASIC BUILDING BLOCKS OF A GOOD CONFESSION] And what if one of the political crooks among us, corrupt people, ate chosen to be somebody´s godfather. [IF ITS A PUBLIC SIN, THEN THEY SHOULD BE DENIED THE PRIVILEGE ALSO] If they are properly wedded by the Church, would we accept them? [SURE. AFTER PROPERLY DISPOSING THEMSELVES] What kind of testimony will they give to their godson? [NONE, UNLESS THEY CHANGE] A testimony of corruption? Things need to change, our standards need to change. [NO, THEY DON'T. IT'S NOT THE STANDARDS THAT NEED TO CHANGE, HOLY FATHER.  IT. IS. WE. WHO. NEED. TO. CHANGE. TO REPENT. TO CONFESS. OUR SINS! DO NOT MAKE IT MORE EASY TO STAY IN SIN! IT IS ALREADY SO VERY EASY TO GET OUT OF SIN, WHY NOT JUST PROMOTE THAT?]

Copyright 2014 David Heath - All Rights Reserved


Photo Credit
His Holiness Ven. Pope Pius IX
King of Rome(1846 – 1878)



On December 8, 1854, having spent all of his holy life – his boyhood, his priesthood, as bishop, cardinal and Pope – at the feet of the Mother of God, the most Blessed Virgin Mary, and having deeply considered also, in his exile at Gaeta, the earnest petitions of Catholics all over the world in its behalf, Pope Pius IX defined ex cathedra, in the glorious Basilica of Saint Peter's before one hundred and seventy bishops and innumerable pilgrims come literally from the ends of the earth, the divine dogma of Our Lady's Immaculate Conception. The voice of the Sovereign Pontiff broke and tears filled his eyes as he paused before uttering the infallible words:

"We declare, pronounce and define that the doctrine which holds that the Blessed Virgin Mary, at the first instant of her conception, by a singular privilege and grace of the Omnipotent God, in virtue of the merits of Jesus Christ, the Savior of mankind, was preserved immaculate from all stain of original sin, has been revealed by God, and therefore should firmly and constantly be believed by all the faithful...."

As the Holy Father finished speaking, the cannon of the Castle of Sant' Angelo boomed and the bells of the basilicas and churches of Rome long rang out the glorious news, which ushered in the Age of Mary – the last age of the world. The Catholic faithful rejoiced, and grace flooded their souls as they prayed the prayer Our Lady herself had given twenty years before to Catherine Laboure, "O Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to thee."


Consecration to the Immaculate Conception

In the presence of God Almighty, Father, Son, and Holy Ghost, and with heaven and earth as our witness, we prostrate ourselves at thy feet, O Mary, Our Lady.

We acknowledge Thee as our Mother, as the Immaculate Conception, living tabernacle of the Divinity, as Queen of angels and of men, as Mother of the Church and of the Catholic priesthood, and as refuge of the afflicted. That is why, small and weak that we are, we wish to consecrate to Thee our Institute, our families, our persons, our works, our future, all that pertains to us and is in us, and which God, in His immeasurable goodness, has entrusted to us for our good use.

We also consecrate to Thee the value of our good actions, past, present, and future, leaving to Thee the entire and full right of disposing of us and all that belongs to us. Mary, be our Mother; sanctify us, purify us, correct us, guide us, pray for us and protect us.

Help us to perfectly fulfill the duties of our state of life. Extinguish in us all self-love, which prevents Thy Divine Son, King and Sovereign Priest, from reigning in and around us.

Cover abundantly with thy maternal protection all the parishes, chapels, schools, works and missions entrusted to the Institute, and mayest Thou forever impede the devil from reigning, in any manner, in this Institute which desires to be entirely Thine for the greater glory of God, the exaltation of our Mother the Holy Catholic Church, and for the conversion of sinners. Amen.

Copyright 2014 David Heath - All Rights Reserved

December 2, 2014

The Assurance of Salvation by Pope Francis

"All of us will be up there together, all of us!"

So...I read in the above headline that it is no longer necessary for me to pay too much attention to how I live. I can pretty much do what I want, revert back to my 60's radical self - "it's all about me" and "I'd like to teach the world to sing" and "this is the dawning of the age of Aquarius". All dogs go to heaven and all that, don'tcha ya know. I don't know how I could have believed all that "Crypto-Lefebvrian" babble. I thought I was someone special, that I needed to pray, fast, give alms, be charitable, Love Christ, pray to Our Lady, Love my brother, "...etcetera, etcetera, etcetera..." (as Yul Brynner said in one of his most famous movie roles.) My whole life has just been reduced to an "etcetera". <sigh> But, the good side is:


Ah...but wait! Au contraire, Mon Ami. 

What do we do about these nasty, unkind and - let's face it - uncharitable words spoken by Our Lord Jesus Christ, as written by His friends, the Apostles - Matthew, Mark, Luke and John - who heard them from Our Lord's own lips:

Matthew 7:13
Enter ye in at the narrow gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way that leadeth to destruction, and many there are who go in thereat.
Matthew 20:16
So shall the last be first, and the first last. For many are called, but few chosen.

Matthew 19:24
And again I say to you: It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of heaven.
Mark 10:25
It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God.

Luke 18:25
For it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God.

John 6:44
No man can come to me, except the Father, who hath sent me, draw him; and I will raise him up in the last day.

John 6:66
And he said: Therefore did I say to you, that no man can come to me, unless it be given him by my Father.

Matthew 5:20
For I tell you, that unless your justice abound more than that of the scribes and Pharisees, you shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven.

Matthew 7:21
Not every one that saith to me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven: but he that doth the will of my Father who is in heaven, he shall enter into the kingdom of heaven.

Matthew 18:3
And said: Amen I say to you, unless you be converted, and become as little children, you shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven.

Matthew 19:23
Then Jesus said to his disciples: Amen, I say to you, that a rich man shall hardly enter into the kingdom of heaven.

Matthew 6:1
Take heed that you do not your justice before men, to be seen by them: otherwise you shall not have a reward of your Father who is in heaven.

I am confused...which one of the two is right?

Do I believe the Son of God? The Redeemer of Mankind? The Way, The Truth, The Life?

Or do I believe His Vicar on Earth, a mere mortal like myself, capable of sin and error, stained with original sin, who only is free from error when he speaks ex cathedra, but at all other times is fully capable of errors in thought, word and action?

Prayer for the Pope

From A Catholic Prayer Book

V. Let us pray for N., the Pope.

R. May the Lord preserve him, give him a long life, make him blessed upon the earth, and may the Lord not hand him over to the power of his enemies.

V. May your hand be upon your holy servant.

R. And upon your son whom you have anointed.

Let us pray. O God, the Pastor and Ruler of all the faithful, look down, in your mercy, upon your servant, N., whom you have appointed to preside over your Church; and grant, we beseech you, that both by word and example, he may edify all those under his charge; so that, with the flock entrusted to him, he may arrive at length unto life everlasting. Through Christ our Lord.

R. Amen.

Copyright 2014 David Heath - All Rights Reserved

November 30, 2014

First Sunday of Advent: The Beginning of the Divorce Liturgical Year

Today is the First Sunday of Advent. The beginning of the Catholic Church's Liturgical Year. It is also, oddly enough, the beginning of the Divorce Liturgical Year. It is the beginning of my 4th Divorce Liturgical Year, and the fifth of my former wife's divorce (for it certainly wasn't mine).

Advent, as we know, marks the 4 weeks leading up to Christmas as we anticipate the Birth anew of the Christ Child, who brings tidings of great joy for all mankind that their redemption is at hand.  At the same time, in the Divorce Advent Season, it leads up to the anticipation of the hoped for re-birth of renewed Parent-Child relationships with estranged children. An anticipation that will hopefully bring tidings of great joy and redemption for both parent and child, already wracked far, far too long by a seemingly unending separation. Advent marks the first Penitential Season, where prayers and sacrifices are offered in anticipation to the Christ Child and for the children of divorce.

Then, Christmas! The Birth of the Christ Child! The redemption of Man is near at hand! All the Choirs of Angels sing the Alleluias, the Shepherds bring their gifts and the Word of God radiates Peace on Earth, Good Will towards Men. But Alas, will it also bring the birth of renewed parent-child relations broken by divorce? The children bringing gifts to a Parent, and the Parent giving gifts to the children? Will a separated family now joined as one radiate the Peace of Christ so envisioned by others at His birth? Will the Alleluias bring out the Good Will so desired? 

After Christmas comes Epiphany, when Christ was revealed to the Three Kings and to the world and salvation was extended to the Gentiles. All - even sinners and pagans - can now be saved through Him. It is also the Epiphany Season of Divorce, when many a Parent await their own salvation from their children, awaiting the glorious day when they - the children - will extend the salvation and forgiveness granted by the Christ Child towards men, towards sinners, to their own parents (or parents) for the evil they have wrought upon their innocent lives.

After Epiphany comes Ash Wednesday and the Season of Lent, the ultimate Penitential Season of the Church, the precursor to the Risen Christ. The Collect of the First Sunday of Lent pleads for us before the Father: "O God who dost purify Thy Church by the yearly fast of Lent; grant to Thy household that what we strive to obtain from Thee by abstinence, by good works we may secure".  

In the Divorce Season of Lent, this prayer is the mission statement of those wracked by divorce. Through prayers, alms, fasting and good works, they pray that their households may be granted Peace and the restoration, in so far as is possible, of the love between parent and child, the respect between Mother and Father, the Parental concern for the Souls of the children. 

EASTER! The dawning of the Resurrection....the day Our Risen Christ openly defies natural death and assures us of Life Everlasting. Again, the Collect of the Mass says it all: "O God, who on this day, through Thine only-begotten Son, didst overcome death and open unto us the gate of everlasting life; as by Thy prompting grace Thou dost breathe on the desires of our hearts, so do Thou ever accompany them with Thy help." 

The Easter of the Divorce Liturgical Year borrows heavily from this Collect, for on this day the desires of those whose families have been torn asunder by divorce, plead to the Risen Christ to overcome the death of their families, open the gates to forgiveness and renewed Love and through the promptings of Grace, defeat The Destroyer of Families. 

And at the end of fifty days, Pentecost, the beginning of the end of the liturgical year. The day that "... the law of grace, of purification from sin, and the sanctification of mankind, was for the first time announced to the world". The day the Holy Ghost gave to the Apostles all the Graces that were needed to convey Christ's Teachings to the world and to continue to build His Church.

 It is also the beginning of the end in the Divorce Liturgical Year, when it is hoped by its victims, that the law of Grace will somehow permeate the hard-shell of spousal relations and melt - through the quenching fire of forgiveness and the enlightenment of the Holy Ghost - the iron-clad estrangement that has so far been impervious to all other methods. There are about 26 weeks to accomplish this seemly herculean task. 

But what if it doesn't happen...what if it all continues into another year?

Then, like the Church's Liturgical Year, it - and you - simply start all over again. It goes with the vows...

Copyright 2014 David Heath - All Rights Reserved

November 29, 2014

One Among Many???

Does this:

Never before seen - Francis bows his head and asks Separated Patriarch: "Bless me and the Church of Rome"

And this:

For the "First Time in History", "silent adoration" and open prayer by a Pope in a Mosque

Signal it's time for this: the One, Holy, Catholic and Apostolic Church seems now just another of the umpteen hundreds of sects, none better than the other; all on equal footing; all of whose adherents are destined for Heaven...

Instead of the One True Church, whose Head on Earth is the direct Successor of Peter, into which Church all others must be admitted or never enter Paradise?

Copyright 2014 David Heath - All Rights Reserved

November 27, 2014


It's hard to imagine I would have anything to be Thankful for today. Not really. My Thanks seemingly ended in 2010, to wit: my Family ended; my Marriage ended; my financial security ended; my confidence ended. My weaknesses in character and Faith overtook me; my spouse allowed fully-reconcilable differences to overtake her; we both allowed emotions to overtake Reason. We both were complicit in the decimation of a marriage and family. We both were selfish and damn uncharitable to each other and to our kids. We threw off the Cross of marriage we had both willingly accepted 22 years earlier. What has happened - what is continuing to  happen - is enough to drive the sane to an asylum; the religious to an agnostic; the virtuous to the unethical. So...I ask again - what is there to be Thankful for?

Well, for starters, I have thankfully chosen to honor my marital vows and and the woman to whom they were spoken. I have retained my Love for all my children, especially those who have chosen to keep this estrangement fueled and fired; I am thankful I have not lost my Catholic Faith over this divorce and annulment, though in Truth I certainly could have - and some have. (Considering the lack of pro-active assistance from the Catholic Church in preserving marriages and my own weakness of Faith, this is perhaps one of the most surprising.) I am thankful how surprisingly easy it has been to restrict my thoughts to only one woman, when I have the legal and moral right to play the field. I long to lay next to a warm body again, to feel love and not just to make love, and am amazed that that desire is still for only one woman. I am thankful I have chosen not to force my children to divide their Love a fourth time with a new step-mother, nor to force them into a blended family not of their choosing - or perhaps their liking. I am thankful I continue to make mistakes large and small, but more thankful that I merit the Grace to know them and make needed corrections. I am thankful - and privileged - that Christ and His Blessed Mother have continued to look with pity upon this miserable Soul who has tried so hard - and sometimes willingly so - to separate himself from their Loving embraces and Hearts. 

Mostly, though, on this particular day - November 27, 2014 - I am so very Thankful that for the first time in 4 long years, I will be enjoying a Thanksgiving Dinner with three of my ten children: my two youngest teenage daughters who now live with me, and their eldest sister who lives nearby. Deo Gratias!!

And to all families torn asunder by divorce: many changes are forced upon us that we cannot change, though we would wish it otherwise. But of those things concerning our own families that we can change - if only in our attitude - one of the most important is that:

God's Blessings To All!

Copyright 2014 David Heath - All Rights Reserved
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