I have never been one to paint a pretty picture of divorce. Far from it. For all my ineptitude in writing, I've always tried to paint its ugliness - its every bit as ugly as Roe v Wade - despite modern society's selfish need to paint it differently. The bloodless letting of innocent blood doesn't make it any easier to swallow. The remorse and sorrow at the ending of innocent lives isn't any easier to bear. The perennial guilt of a parent over their frailty that may have contributed to a family's destruction is no less real. Yes, the abortion of a live, breathing, smiling, loving and animated family is no less easier to bear than that of an innocent child in the womb. Both have been willingly slain for selfish motives. Period.
Catholic parents do not know - or do not care to know - the landscape of the road that stretches before them when they divorce. As I've written before, Charity is the first Virtue that, by necessity, flies away, as it cannot stomach the gross injustice that is to be thrust upon the innocent. That is not to say that Hope and Faith don't also fly away - in most cases they do. But as Charity is the greatest of the three, it's understandable that it carries the graver weight. Is it not a truth that Our Lord, whose life was as much about Charity as it was about Love, is not grievously offended by either form of abortion?
I cannot begin to describe the myriad of emotions that envelop one post-divorce. I can tell you that it took at least two years for the winds to stop buffeting mine, and another two before I could handle the almost daily emotional surprises that come:
- setting in Church as tears well in your eyes because you miss your family - and your spouse.
- working at your desk when the flood of emotions dilute your environment as you set and think, but for divorce, your child would not be seeing a psychiatrist.
- the dread you feel at knowing the future pain and sorrow your estranged children will endure because they still refuse to see the Love that was always there, but has repeatedly been called into question by a parent.
- the almost daily need to beg - BEG - for Divine assistance for the Graces needed to not fail your children, yourself, your marriage vows, and yes, even your former spouse.
Copyright 2015 David Heath - All Rights Reserved